goodbyes

Remember this post? That was almost 2 years ago! Today was the last Tuesday of my 6:30AM babysitting gig. The crew's grown by one in the last two years...last two months actually. I love those kids. I really do. It's been awesome watching them grow up. That little girl who threw her poptarts on the floor is still crazy, and I still cringed this morning when she didn't use her "inside voice." But I've treasured the times that I've read her a story, the pictures she's drawn of me, and every single time she's told me she loves me. The little boy who climbed the counters in order to "help" me is still defiant, but I love that about him. He tries to be so independent, and he makes the best big brother. That baby who drooled all over me is now a toddler, and he still throws a fit when I can't hold him sometimes. That's my favorite. It sounds awful, but it makes me feel so good that he wants me there. He still eats yogurt too, but not as much as he used to :) The two month old doesn't say much, but I've enjoyed his company and adorable smiles these past two months.

All that said, I'm still a little relieved I'm done. Have I mentioned I'm not a morning person? I have? So I'm not going to miss getting up at 5:30AM every Tuesday. And four kids is kind of a lot to handle. Their parents are saints.

But I am going to miss their too cute little selves. Hopefully I'll still get to babysit them occasionally :)

updates

This past weekend was Jessica's wedding. It was a "spiritual experience," and she was a "vision of loveliness," at least according to her new aunt. She was gorgeous, and everything was beautiful. I'm so happy for her and her new husband, Nate!

The wedding was on July 3rd, and I stayed to watch fireworks on the 4th with the two of them, her new brothers, and Kristi. The fireworks were pretty amazing. The weekend was kind of like taking a stroll down memory lane as we were in Gibraltar for a bit, and the fireworks were less than a mile down from what used to be the hospital that I was born at. I miss family.

Speaking of which, my sister's been visiting from Arizona since Saturday night/Sunday morning. I feel kind of bad because it's been too hot to do a lot of the things we wanted to. That seems funny since she's from one of the hottest places in the U.S., but her beautiful home is devoid of the wonderful stickiness that we get to experience throughout the summer here in Michigan. We did get to go to the zoo this week though. I've already talked about how much I love the zoo, so I won't go into it again, but we did have a lot of fun even in the 90 degree weather. After the zoo we did my next favorite thing and got Starbucks followed by going to the bookstore. Perfect day. Other than that, we've just kind of been bumming around. She leaves tomorrow, and I'm definitely not ready for her to go. I'll miss her.

So will the side of me that's been eating crap since she's been here. Usually I'm semi-health conscious, but my diet's been composed of mostly chocolate cake and M&M's while she's been here.

Which brings me to an update on my goals. I'm doing okay so far. I felt guilty after eating a giant burrito from Qdoba and half a bag of M&M's today, so I went for a pretty long bike ride. It was fun, and I felt great afterward :) The journal one's not going so well, but here I am blogging and it hasn't even been a month, so there's another one. The whole morning person thing is an ongoing struggle that sometimes I win, but mostly I don't. I'm still working on them though.

I'm going to go watch Return to Me with Stacie now. Goodnight.

objectives; goals; ambitions; aspirations

I have NEVER been able to brag about fulfilling goals. I've made plenty. There are many pieces of paper and word documents that have met with my pen, or keystrokes, and have ended up as just that -- pieces of paper and word documents with some words scrawled/typed across. Who knows where they've ended up. The trash can? Forgotten half-filled notebooks stashed in the bottom of a desk drawer? Deleted MySpace profiles? Crashed hardrives? Fallen Post-it notes stuck behind the dresser? The possibilities are endless, but it doesn't really matter; no matter where those lists would have ended up, the goals on them probably wouldn't have been achieved.

For some of these goals, though originally well-meaning in nature, it's probably for the best. Others didn't really matter in the first place. But I know there are some that I've just been lazy and negligent about. I don't want that to be the case anymore, so I'm approaching this whole goals subject from a different angle this time. I'm going to trick them. My first goal is to stick to achieving my goals. I don't think that's been on the list before, and I'm foolishly hoping it works this time.

As much as that's a joke, it's also the sad truth. I'm hoping that when I decide I want to be lazy, I'll think of that first goal and be guilted into fulfilling the others instead. Does that make sense? No? Yeah, I know. But I've found that a lot of the time things that don't make sense still seem to work.

So here are goals 2-5:

2. Become a morning person: I know, I'm pretty skeptical about the possibility of that one too, but I found a little inspiration through this blog post.

3. Journal at least once a day week: If I ever have kids, and they ask me about something from when I was their age, instead of sitting there looking up at the sky, I want to pull out a book and let them read it for themselves.

4. Blog at least once a month: I know I have very few readers, but I really enjoy reading other people's posts, so maybe they enjoy reading mine too.

5. Ride my [mom's] bike a lot this summer: We're in the process of moving...kind of. We haven't sold our "old" house yet, so we're still living in it while the "new" house has a little reconstructive surgery done. The "new" house is probably about a mile from the "old" one, and I find myself driving over there a lot because walking there isn't very quick. Which is dumb, when I could just bike, so I think I will :)

I'll start with those and see where they take me...

in six minutes or less:

• the disk drive in my computer won't stay in my computer.
• according to my podiatrist, my toe's healing correctly.
• one more week and I'm done with JCC...hopefully forever.
• I really, really want to see Phantom of the Opera.
• I applied for Central almost two weeks ago.
• my dad's building me a room in the new house...a big one.
• just finished Men and Dogs by Katie Crouch...controversial for a novel...I liked it...don't judge.
• I still have three tests, a paper, a forum post, a quiz, a journal entry, and a group project due before the end of the semester.
• I'm really not looking forward to babysitting at 6:30 in the morning.
• added another wedding to this summer's list.
• my fingernails are blue...and everyone let me know that today...even though I painted them two and a half weeks ago.

Time's up.

officially old

Last week, my doctor scheduled an appointment with a podiatrist for me. I've been battling an ingrown toenail for the last three or four years, and I finally decided that I needed professional help. My appointment was this morning. I figured he'd look at it and set up an appointment to actually do something about it like cut out the ingrown part...amputate my toe...you know...whatever it is that those feet people do. Well, I underestimated the process. Apparently they just go ahead and cut it out right there. A how-do-you-do? and then they stick a needle in your toe and you walk out with your toe looking like a giant q-tip.

Actually I found it all kind of cool. First he numbed my toe, which actually hurt really bad because of the stinging (apparently most of the stinging's from the alcohol that he cleaned the area with before inserting the needle...I asked). Then he just kind of dug in there for about two minutes, and it didn't hurt, but I could feel pressure in my toe. He bandaged it up, and I was good to go. I was glad I'd worn flip-flops because I don't think I could've fit my foot into a whole shoe.

The fun part was driving with a numb toe. The other fun part was sitting at work, touching my toe, and not being able to feel it. It never got old.

Here's a picture of what my foot looks like right now. Warning: it's not pretty (the icky yellow color is from the stuff they had to wash my foot with).

Yeah, I'm officially an old lady who goes to the foot doctor.

girls in white dresses

I knew it was coming. I've watched it happen to my older friends and relatives, and now it's my turn. The weddings start this year. Not in general, of course, but for my friends. I've hit that age where it seems like everybody's getting married. I think it's supposed to make me feel old, but it's having the opposite effect on me. I feel like the baby, which isn't much of a change for me actually. All Most of my friends are talking about weddings and houses and babies, and I'm trying to figure out which school I'm going to go to in the fall. Weddings and houses and babies are way too far away for me right now. I realize I'm a little behind in the whole choosing a school department, so I guess that's kind of okay; it's just weird I guess. I mean we always talked about getting married and starting families, but we also talked about going to Columbia and becoming lawyers who saved the world while wearing really cute shoes. It was always just a far off dream.

It probably sounds like I'm whining, and that's probably because I am a little bit. Don't get me wrong though. I'm elated for my coupled friends, and I'm so excited to start going to their weddings. I guess I'm just feeling a little bit left behind. Not by anyone's fault. I mean seriously, I have the best friends when it comes to making sure I don't feel like a third wheel just in general. Most of them even keep PDA down to a minimum (unlike the couple I saw in the hall at school today who were literally on top of each other...why do people think that's alright?...because it's not). But there's that inevitable moment when you're hanging out with your best friend and you can tell that she would seriously rather be with her significant other than having a girls night. It's not like she says anything, but you can just tell. Probably because that's how I would feel if I were her. And I can't blame her. It's just the way life goes. I'm dealing.

Kind of in the same direction...I was recently talking to Morgan about how much fun it is when people ask if you're dating anyone or engaged, and then proceed to say, "you better get on that," when you let them know you're not. Really people? Really? I'm twenty-one for crying out loud! It's not like it's the nineteenth century anymore, and my welfare depends on a prudent marriage. I have time, and I actually like the way things are going right now. In fact, I think I'd be perfectly fine if I never married at all. That's not to say that I don't ever want to get married because some day I might. Someday is just definitely not today or tomorrow. So seriously, stop making me feel like a loser for still being single. Trust me, there are so many other things that make me a loser, and I don't think being single is one of them.

And to all of my currently engaged and soon-to-be engaged friends, I really am very happy for you :)

canyons, fake nails, and new houses, oh my!

Again, Kelsey has persuaded me that it's time for another post. So here it is:

I just got back from visiting my sister in Arizona last Sunday. I was there for an entire week and I'm 99.6317% sure it was the best vacation I've ever had. I think it may even beat Disney World. Here's how the week went:

Sunday: My plane actually arrived in Phoenix, not on time, but EARLY. For those of you who know my luck with traveling, this fact is huge. I was a little nervous about flying by myself for the first time, but the worst part was pulling my very heavy bag--heavy from the 10 lb. Priciples of Accounting book nestled on top of my week's worth of clothing--off the luggage carousal. Stacie picked me up, and we went to lunch at the BEST Mexican restaurant called El Palacio's. It was a rainy day, and I was tired from the trip, so we just rented a movie and stayed in all day. The rain actually turned into a little storm that was pretty impressive to watch. I really thought the palm tree outside her apartment was going down, but it didn't :)

Monday: My birthday was a week before my trip, so when I woke up on Monday, Stacie and Chris gave me a present and basically forced me to get out of bed. And I was glad I did because they had decorated the apartment with birthday banners, streamers, and pin the tail on the donkey. They, along with Hannah, their golden retriever, were wearing party hats as well. We played pin the tail on the donkey at about 7 in the morning so that Chris could play before he had to go to work. That's my excuse for losing...

After we got ready we went and got our nails done. This was kind of an experience for me. It was my first time getting my nails done, and as lame is it sounds, I didn't really know what to expect. I couldn't really understand the guy that did them because of a language barrier, so we exchanged a lot of awkward smiles and the occassional "I have no idea what you're saying" chuckle. Even though I spent a lot of time trying to file them down after we left, I love them. Although I'm still trying to get used to long nails.

We did a little shopping after getting our nails done. The malls in the Phoenix area are huge! The guy at the Aveda store gave us some of the best tea I've ever had (which you can purchase for $14 per box--we didn't), and I got my free birthday lip glosses from Sephora :) That evening we watched a movie and ate the most delicious chocolate banana pie that my sister made for my birthday!

Tuesday: Tuesday was a little gloomy, so we decided to go to the aquarium. It was so much fun! We went kind of late, and we were the only ones there, so I didn't feel awkward acting like my goofy self when I'm around my sister. There were so many cool things--like a water ride (that we didn't go on) that actually goes through the aquarium and a sting ray pool. The sting rays actually come up to you and slap the water for food. They were so funny!

Wednesday: We went to the Grand Canyon!! I was so giddy as we walked toward it, and then when I actually saw it, I was in awe. If you've never seen the Grand Canyon, I definitely recomend that you do at some point. It's breath-taking. How anyone couldn't believe in an all-powerful Maker after witnessing something so magnificent is beyond me. Here are some pictures, but they don't do it any justice.

These pictures are from the way there, but on the way back we ran into a blizzard. Stacie hadn't driven in snow in about a year, so I volunteered to drive...before we actually hit the blizzard. I had to go between 25-30 mph on a 75 mph highway with an hour where traffic was stopped completely. A four hour drive turned into an eight hour nightmare. After getting through the snow, I very willingly handed the wheel back to Stacie. I never want to see snow again. But I have to admit that the Grand Canyon was worth it, although I'll probably never go back in the winter.

Thursday: We went on a trail ride at Lake Saguaro. Ok, so I've ridden a horse a couple times...on pretty level ground...for about 30-45 min. at a time. This trail kicked my butt, and I was sitting on it the entire time. It was an hour and half ride up and down a pretty steep mountain with really narrow trails. It was really pretty though, and I learned a lot about the desert. It was a pretty cool experience.

Friday: The zoo! If you know me, then you probably know that I absolutely love the zoo. I've always thought that the zoo would make a really cool first date--I mean that way if you really don't hit if off, at least you have something cool to do. Anyway, that has nothing to do about going to the zoo with my sister and brother-in-law. The Phoenix Zoo is absolutely beautiful (which seems to be a reoccuring theme in this post). There's even a small lake in the center that you can take paddleboats out on, and there's two little monkeys that inhabit the island in the center. Unanimously, our favorite exhibit was the monkey exhibit that you could actually walk through. They were so cute! We went to the San Tan Brewery for dinner where we sat on the sidewalk under really cool heater things and I had the best burger I've ever had!

Saturday: A bittersweet day since it was the day before I had to leave. Stacie and I went for a hike on the Heiroglyphics trail in the Superstition Mountains. This was so cool! It was really hot, the trail was really rocky, and we were starting to get really tired when Stacie asked me if I heard water. I did, but half attributed it to the wind (or a mirage...that you hear instead of see...I mean, we were in the desert). As we got closer, it became clearer that it was definitely water. After climbing over some really big rocks--that gave me more than one bruise--we found a small waterfall! It was like an oasis in the middle of the desert. The trail's known for the petroglyphs on the rocks, but I was so mesmerized by the clear and refreshing water that it was hard for me to pay as much attention to the glyphs as I had intended. I even took my shoes and socks off and put my toes in the water. It was blissful :) Oh, and I got a sunburn, which kind of made my whole vacation in a weird way. I mean if I was in the sun long enough to get a sunburn, then it was a good vacation, right?

Sunday: I went home :( After a gate change scare, the plane ride went pretty smoothly. Coincidentally, the Hillsdale College track team was on the same plane as me. I actually found out before Sunday, but my parent's bought a new house...around the block. Which is really cool for them, but it means that we have to get the one we have now ready to sell. Which I feel would be a lot easier if I weren't in the middle of my most stressful semester. And, alas, reality begins again.

I miss the mountains.